sometimes, these things just happen.

(Yes, yes, E. It's been a while.)

It's just been that kind of year. The kind that sort of swallows you up and spits you out. And while you're still the same you that you always were, you are also fundamentally changed in ways you can't yet put words to.

So, internet. In a few short months from now, I will be someone's wife. And then, a few more months from now, I'll be someone's mother. Crazy, I know. My own self-perceptions are still running to catch up to the reality of events.

Happy? Yes. Scared? Totally. I bought a couch for the first time a year ago and the commitment to a large, heavy piece of furniture truly freaked me out a little. I can only describe marriage and a kid as feeling kind of like purchasing a groovy-looking couch you can't return. Freaked.

On the other hand, my life is becoming what it is I've always deeply wanted--a little house near the beach, a garden, a scratchy-faced someone for kissing and mutual understanding, and someone small to bake disastrous buttercream iced muppet-shaped birthday cakes for.

It is yet another chapter. It will be, as was most of the last ten years, improvised, imperfect and by the seat of my pants. I also hope it will be just as much fun.